I had a bit of a breakthrough today. I realized the lack of subtleties that I generally feel with people. I think this is partially because that even if something is slight- I can feel it at a full force level and when something is full force, it can literally be overwhelming to me.
Which led me to realizing something that I have struggled with. The difference between like and LIKE. Hi. Holy crud at this realization. I am good at realizing what like is, but when I have experienced LIKE- it has often been a feeling from people that I have no interest in. Therefore, I close down and run.
Here’s something that is interesting though- I often times hope that like will turn in to LIKE. Or their like for me is so strong that it comes out as LIKE at the beginning and then I ignore that it fades to like as time goes on and I am around them more. I hang on to that brief feeling of LIKE, even when I know, deep down, that that is not really the reality.
Well hello there realization. Can I even begin to say how much of an issue this has been? Can I even begin to explain the frustration I’ve had with ‘almost relationships’ because my empath self confused the subtleties that exist in this particular portion of human emotion? I seem to do well with most of the other emotions, but I also do not know if that is because I can recognize the subtleties or maybe there are not as many subtleties in those emotions.
I was floored by this tiny realization. By this thing that suddenly just clicked over in my mind that I had has issue with subtleties and that that issue could be solved by some very simple things. People do like me, but there are not many people I have run across that set off my ‘spidey sense’ for LIKE. And that is fine- I don’t want that spidey sense going off like crazy-but I can also now go ‘yep that’s like, there is no LIKE here’ and that is okay. This realization will probably save me hours upon hours of scrolling through blog after blog looking for something to tell me if a person LIKES me. I will trust that my like sensor is more attuned than my LIKE sensor and if someone is in the second category- they’ll do their part to truly prove it- without me ever having to consult a single thing.